searching for plutonium powder

Just across the border in a distant foreign land called Idaho, where rural population growth is little concern... they've been planning a nuclear and otherwise toxic waste incinerator. A few miles further west, the beloved Idaho National Laboratory (INL) is receiving confirmation from the DOE to consolidate its program for Radioisotope Power Systems, thus becoming the nation's centralized refuge for the production of plutonium-238. Press releases confirm its usage for fuel to feed NASA's ridiculous ploy to continue stomping the Russians and Japanese through the 21st century. Discussions on emissions and meltdowns have been avoided in meet the press with antisemitic jetsonian scientists from the region. And no correlation has been met toward American hardliners spitting demands contra North Korea, Iran, or the late Iraqi executive branch upon their theorized plutonium production.

The INL is located northeast of Boise in a sparsely populated region of rocky chaparral and desert. It's surrounded by thousands of miles of fencing and potentially covert sniper sites from hoodoo ledges. The place is heavily guarded, restricts overhead air-traffic, and just screams obvious nuclear testing. You may have seen it on your way to Craters of the Moon National Park, where the nation's ugliest president Lyndon B. Johnson (more facially appalling and deformed than Tricky) directed furtive conspirators to film the Apollo landing. Shit, we couldn't let the reds slap us in the face again. And now this awesome land's history has passed on toward nuclear technology.
Here in Jackson one must speak the language for our brand of neo-activists to come forth. One such campaign is the "Plutonium-Free Powder" opposition which newly arrived locals can see frequently pinned upon suv bumperstickers. The campaign appears successful, as it speaks directly to the luke-warm hearts of summer home, 3.2 children, chairlifting settlers of Jackson. I must agree with the aims, though it reminds me of many hypocritical floundering altruisms such as buying organic... from an Extra Foods superstore market (Canada's Wal-Mart).
And so, today I went in search of the plutonium powder; the first day upon my snowboard this year. The last time I recall snowboarding was eight years ago on the slopes of Mount Bachelor. I thought the snowboarding girls were cute (and they were)... and I wanted to join them. Some time has passed, and in many ways I haven't changed.
I never did find the plutonium powder, which is a good thing. Instead I found immense slabs of ice and crusty chunks of snows that grated like kitty litter beneath my board. I somehow reached the bottom of the mountain, packed it up... and went to watch turkey day football at the tavern and shoot a few games of pool by myself.